I'd always known she loved me, but it was then I realized what I'd done. I'd kept her waiting all these years, with unspoken promises of someday, maybe, perhaps ... There were no words to repair this.Sitting up, she began putting her own clothes in order. She put on her shoes, picked up her purse and stared down at me with ice in her eyes."Please, wait," I begged. "We need to talk about this." This?" she cried. "We could have had this for years! When you kissed me, back when we were still girls, you knew I loved you then. You joked about it, but you knew, you just didn't care. And once I realized I could never have you, it really didn't matter who had me, did it?" Tears were streaming from her eyes."Sit down, wait, please," I begged, trying to find some way to make this right.She shook her head. "No, I need to be alone for a while."After she'd gone, I forced myself to get up and stand in the shower. Under the scalding water I let myself go, shrieking and tearing at my hair. I spewed. "This college thing is so not for me." She said as she went into the bathroom to take a shower.A lot had been going on in Sam Puckett's life lately that she thought she would never happen. First there was the college thing which she still hadn't figured out how Carly had talked her into that one. And secondly there were the last couple of weeks with Freddie. What had gone down in the last few weeks, both shocked her and put a smile on her face.She, nor anyone else, would have ever dreamed that Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson would be dating. That's right. Dating. Albeit secretly dating because she wasn't ready to tell anyone yet, especially Carly. She remembered how much Carly had freaked out when she first learned about that time when she and Freddie kissed out on the balcony. Carly didn't take it well, and Sam remembered how Freddie and she both promised to never keep any secrets from Carly ever again. But this was different. She just wasn't ready to tell Carly, and she sure wasn't.
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