“Oh, don’t lie to me and tell me you weren’t rock hard the whole fucking time.”I remained silent, but she kept going, “It’s the power over him. It’s thrilling, scary, and blazing hot all at the same time. It’s intoxicating and you know what? He doesn’t know it yet, but I bet I love it more than he does. It started out as an act out there. As a show, but I got swept up in a wave of… I have no idea what it was a wave of, but it was awesome.” She paused to study me, and then she flashed in anger.“Fucking spill it, Matt! You don’t get to see our raw selves and not say anything. I need to hear what you think and I don’t care if it’s a no. You owe us that at this point.”“I don’t know where to start, J.” I paused and put my head in my hands and rubbed my face. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I just don’t know what’s right, you know? It sounds like it’s right for you, but I don’t know about me.”I stood up and started to pace in their kitchen. Justine looked worried and more unsure. “Have you been there?”“No. It’s not the same without my friends.”“Does your doctor have you on a diet?” I asked.“It sucks! I have to eat stuff I don’t like.”“And so you cheat, right?”She nodded, “Candy, chips, pop. My mom and dad both work so I can get away with it.”“Where do they work?” I asked.“My dad is a bricklayer so he works wherever the union sends him. My mom works as an administrator at the Museum of Science and Industry. She does fund-raising campaigns, mostly.”“Do you get any exercise besides karate?” I asked.“No.”“Jacquelyn, do you want to lose weight and get in shape?”“Why? It won’t change anything. Nobody likes me. They all think I’m a freak. I asked a guy who I kind of knew to go to a turnabout dance, you know, where the girl asks the guy? He told me he’d rather stay home than go with a fat pig!”Now there was a guy I’d like to have in the dojo for twenty minutes. As a sparring partner. Without protective gear. Anyone with that little respect for another person needed.
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